“I’m so tired of being the smartest person in the room!”
Two yrs ago, I remember walking out of an event, calling my husband and saying this very statement. No, I wasn’t saying this bc I’m some egotistical jerk. I was saying this as a woman who was tired of going into a room, giving everything I had, only to leave the room feeling depleted and with nothing to show for it. I was over watering myself down to accommodate others.
So in the spirit of sharing life lessons, I thought I’d share with you 3 reasons why you should never be the smartest (or highest earning) woman in the room.
Reason #1: It hinders your growth.
Hanging out in a room where nobody was doing anything greater than what I was doing was stifling my growth and progression.
I felt stuck and had lost my vision for expansion, because I didn’t see anything better around me. And this wasn’t because of some major fundamental flaw within me, this feeling was bc I had outgrown my environment.
Yet, as painfully obvious as this had become, there was some comfort in remaining in those types of spaces and there was a perceived sense of discomfort at the thought of leaving to find other events.
Reason #2: It feeds your ego.
Realizing you’ve outgrown your space isn’t egotistical, but you know what is?! Staying in those rooms to feed your ego, bc being revered and known as the ‘go-to-expert’ feels better than going into the big leagues where you may be the low woman on the totem pole once again. Or at least that’s the story I told myself to keep me playing small. I got really comfortable in this space, and enjoyed the accolades…until I didn’t.
Reason #3: You get burnt out.
Sure, it feels great to be in a room where you’re mentoring other women or young girls who are a former version of yourself, so you can help uplift them and empower them to make big moves like you’ve made. That’s beautiful and honorable, and it can be part of your giveback strategy for sure. It feels great because you’ve gone in with the intention of pouring into the aspiring event-goers.
That’s not what we’re talking about here.
What I’m talking about in this blog are the rooms you’re in when it comes to your own networking or personal/professional development. This is where it’s so important that there are others who are at your level and beyond. Because in those spaces, when you are continuously giving but not receiving anything in return, it’s only a matter of time until you start to feel exhausted.
We go into these types of events with the intention of learning something or having an experience that helps expand us, so if we leave empty handed, it’s natural for us to feel disappointed. There needs to be a harmony or balance between giving and receiving. This is where we truly feel fulfilled.
The time for ordinary or average women is over. Each of us is extraordinary in our own unique way. And when we can’t see possibilities of where we’d like to be mirrored in the circles we run in, it’s time to move on! Get yourself unstuck. Step into something greater.
So how do you know if this applies to you?
If this resonates, then I invite you to look at the ways you may be playing small in your biz & your life, and be open to the possibilities of what it would look like for you to play a bigger game.
Journal about it a bit and get fantastical. Don’t let that left-brain keep you limited in your vision.
- Who do you have to be?
- What does that version of you look like?
- And what’s stopping you from being her today?
Share your answers with me on the Gram here. I look forward to hearing from you!!